On Motherhood and Making Excuses :: Guest Post with Alicia Caine
I am so excited and honored to introduce you to Alicia Caine…I adore her blog and was thrilled when she agreed to guest post for us!! Her encouraging, no-nonsense style of writing is so refreshing yet challenging and I think you’ll see what I mean in her post below. You’ll grimace yet agree as she addresses those areas that we, as moms, let slide in the midst of motherhood…enjoy
(oh, and leave her some comment love below and then check out her blog! )
I’m a mom to six ranging in age from 10 to 6 months. People often tell me, “I could never have that many kids”. What they really mean to say is “I don’t want that many kids,” which is totally fine! I get that! I often say “I don’t want that many kids” but then, I get baby fever and something in me takes over. I CAN have that many as long as my ovaries and uterus are intact, right?
I also homeschool and I hear “I could never homeschool” diatribes all the time. Again, it is more of a matter between wanting and not wanting. If you were 3,000% dying to homeschool your kids, you would find a way, because you’re incredibly smart and crafty like that.
I’m also the full-time breadwinner for our home. People always tell me, “I could never have a business to bring in money to support my family.” Again, I have never met someone who thought it would be absolutely impossible to take their talents and gifts and make a living with it. Difficult and with many struggles, absolutely. But impossible? Not at all.
When we refuse to say exactly what we mean, we start buying into our own lies that we tell ourselves. They seem like such little lies, harmless….but they grow and we begin to not be able to see what is truth.
Our attitude in any given situation is our biggest hurdle to getting the things we want and need in life.
I’m not writing this to get you defensive and fighting about why you aren’t doing something you know would be beneficial in your life.
I’m challenging you to break down that attitude you have with yourself. No one needs to know the battle you are currently having (unless of course you want to share it for encouragement) – we just want to get clear on why, EXACTLY, you aren’t doing something you would like to be doing.
Take me, for example. I used to skip showering every day. A few times a week was fine because I “didn’t have time” to take a shower.
“I can’t take a shower every day because I have no running water” is a valid reason for not taking a shower. In reality, I had water. I didn’t want to shower because I preferred to sleep in late, to spend time on Facebook, and to de-prioritize taking care of myself because I didn’t see the point.
After taking a hard look at my attitude toward something so basic, I started showering daily. I also started running.
“I don’t run because I have no legs” is not the same as “I don’t run because I hate feeling pain.” “I don’t like being sweaty” “I don’t want to take the time to do it.” “I have a million things I’d rather be doing.”
What are those things that are screaming at you for attention – those things that you know you need to be doing in your home, in your heart?
Are you being honest with yourself about why you aren’t doing them? Are you making excuses or justifying something by creating untruths about the matter?
Of course I can take a shower every day. It just requires me getting up 20 minutes before the kids get up, which requires me getting to bed at a decent time and setting an alarm clock.
Of course I can feed my family healthier. It just requires me researching recipes within my budget and being intentional about choosing healthier options that are often less convenient from a pre-packaged, ready-made point of view.
Of course I can exercise every day. It just requires committing to putting loving energy toward my body. I can include my kids by letting them exercise alongside me with a video in the living room.
What are you currently resisting? What excuses are you making to justify the real reason which you are afraid or ashamed to speak aloud?
You can overcome those roadblocks, but you’ve got to see them for what they are first.
The hurdles and the roadblocks lose their power when you’re able to be completely honest with yourself. Each one can be scaled and torn down.
Alicia is a homeschooling mother to six living in the sticks of Pennsylvania. She is also a business consultant, author, avid runner training for her first half marathon and new blogger at aliciacaine.com.
This post is linked to Down Home Blog Hop, Homemaking Link Up